Let me be clear: I LOVE True New Yorkers™
Now, there's a rule of thumb that says after 11** years of living in NYC, you are a "real" New Yorker.
I disagree; New York is a spirit. New York is a energy. New York is compassion. New York is smart. New York is funny. New York is fast. New York is fun.
Lately though, I feel as if I have been in a boxing ring:
I feel as if I bounced in each time only to be chased out, or almost chased out. But each time I returned with enthusiasm. Ready to go another round.
And there have been disappointments along the way.
Disappointments in the sense of people who happen to live in New York, but really are not the soul of New Yorkers.
THEY are not New York. Why they are here, I've no idea.
And, unfortunately, their actions have affected my livelihood here in NYC. No matter how many times I got back into the ring, there seemed to be a left hook swinging.
And I dodged, bobbed, weaved, and fought back.
I tried to stay in my bubble, my happy NYC bubble, and repeat to myself that
I WILL triumph.
The True New Yorkers™ have been nothing but warm, kind, and helpful.
And I hesitate to write in detail here, as since I started this blog - which was started as a spur of the moment kind of thing for me and friends which in turn developed into a GPS for family to check in to see where I was, where I was going, and how things were going.
But then, there was a moment or three, where I was alerted to the fact that some reading my blog who were not in my corner.
And, when you're in the ring no matter if the opponent is 7 feet tall or 60 pounds, you need all the confidence you can muster or fake; having the hecklers behind you when you are doubting yourself I realize is part of the sport; but in round 5 when you are wondering if it's worth it, you need all the supporters you can rally.
And that stalled me at certain times; I didn't want to blog anymore. Because all I could think of were the way those people felt about me. Finding out they were reading this or had access to the blog, well, deflated me.
I edited - heavily. I started editing back in New Mexico, and as time marched on and I realized more that were not on "my team" were reading, well, the fun was sort of gone.
I know, I shouldn't give a hoot what people think.
This was done for fun, to share with those I loved, and for the people I know loved and cared for me.
Until part 2 where I will elaborate more, you can peruse this which I stumbled on after writing this post: http://bit.ly/dxKGiM
**I remember the 11 yr 'factoid' from someone saying this to me as a teenager; I've no idea what the rule of thumb is.